Nicole Callihan: February 2017 Poet of the Month
Jan Erik Waider
48.
Do you believe me believe me
if I could be other I would
would I the peaches in the bowl
the lock that someone changed
I bailed on language before it
bailed on me and this
is not a metaphor the things
were things before they were words
if I could be other would I
would you will me to be was I already
before I became deep in my cells
my mother guns it on a dirt road
I try to flag her down in the dark
49.
I try to flag her down in the dark
but the stars are too far gone
all yesterday I drank pink wine
from a tin cup I make
no one proud the sun was weak
today I’m slow can only see
outlines outline of the fox
of you of my daughters talking
the clouds moving in this life
I’ve built my hands are dusty
with chalk will not so soon
or soon be dust again
my days I waste this way
50.
My days I waste this way
as thou mayst in me behold
and I behold in thee
the rain that falls the leaf
that follows the bomb
in college I dressed up
as Ophelia flower haired
and lay on top of a tombstone
a boy who couldn’t love me
took pictures there is much
to take in this life the train
a pill good old fashioned grief
I unlearn to learn how to be
51.
I unlearn to learn how to be
to learn how to be one must
learn what they already are
or is it what they are not
what is it that is indivisible
the child that sits inches
from the television that covers
her eyes when one soap star
kisses another soap star
the stars that we once were
the soap that sits in the dish
the dish itself a disappointment
the hunger I have is not hunger
52.
The hunger I have is not hunger
a state of grace what I long for
is peace this morning
my husband held me
in our bed and the cup
on the table held water
and the sky out the window
held a few clouds
and my girls’ bodies held
their hearts and I held
my breath this is all I have
to offer you the few words
held in this small poem
Hillery Stone
Nicole Callihan is the author, most recently, of The Deeply Flawed Human (Deadly Chaps, 2016) and SuperLoop (Sock Monkey Press, 2014). She teaches at New York University and lives in Brooklyn, New York.
